Nobody Wins
by White Weasel
Summary: It only takes Toris three years to confirm what everyone knows: Life under The Capitol is unfair.
1. Feliks Łukasiewicz

**AN: Once again another story I wrote sophomore year. I have the next chapter also written so I'll upload that as well. There are two more segments after that (so there's four chapters in total) that haven't been written/fully completed yet so yeah. I'll work on that when I get the time but I'm kinda posting these to motivate myself to finish them lol Anyways yeah once again, bear in mind I wrote these first two chapters over two years ago and if I were to write them today I would probably go about it a bit differently but I'm going to post them as is right now. Hope you enjoy!**

Toris nervously stood in his section along with all the other sixteen year old boys. He was wearing his late father's green suit. In any other situation this fact alone would have given him confidence, but not today. Today was the reaping for the 33rd annual Hunger Games; anybody in their right mind would be scared.

"Hey, I'm sure it'll, like, be totally fine." Toris glanced over at his long time friend Feliks. His green eyes held a look of assurance. However, it didn't do much to quell the other boy's fear. Feliks, as the son of one of District 3's richer occupants, only had his name in the bowl five times. However, Toris's own was in there twice as many. Every year he had been eligible for The Games he had taken terrasse. Though, he was always too scared - or maybe selfish- to sign up for it more than once every year, even if it would have helped him and his brothers out.

Thinking of his brothers Toris quickly turned his attention to seeking them out of the crowd. Eduard easily stood out in the fifteen year old section. He seemed to be keeping his composure fairly well. Toris's eyes darted their way over to the fourteen year olds. Raivis was also easy to spot, though for different reasons than Eduard. The young boy was terribly small and shaking like a leaf. He had acted like that for the previous two reapings as well.

"Toris, everyone will be fine." Feliks placed a hand on his friend's shoulder. "And then we can, like, eat a huge meal at my place!"

"I know… I just can't help but worry. I have ten slips in there, Eduard's name is on eight, and Raivis has six… The odds aren't really in our favor."

Feliks narrowed his eyes. "They aren't in anyone else's favor either. You just need to, like, have a little hope." Toris simply sighed and turned toward the platform in front of everyone.

A very gaudy looking man waltzed to the microphone in between the two large glass bowls. His hair seemed to be poofed up in a fashion that defied gravity and was a hideous shade of purple. It matched with his indigo suit and oddly shiny white shoes. He gave a large smile to the audience.

"Welcome District 3 to the 33rd Hunger Games!" Nobody moved. "Well let's start off with this amazing video!" The same video that had been shown every year was projected for everyone to see. After that the Treaty was read and it was the moment of truth. The Reaping.

"As a true gentleman, we'll start with the girls." He carefully placed his hand in the bowl and plunged it to the bottom. He pulled it back up and opened it. Toris didn't catch the name that was read, but it didn't matter much to him. He was more interested in the boy's name that would be called.

The district escort gracefully slid to the other bowl. "And now, who will be the lucky young man?" Unlike with the girls, his hand stopped in the middle and started to swirl around a bit, almost as if he was trying to milk the suspense for all it was worth. Once he had carefully selected the paper he pulled it out and _gosh, has he always been this slow?!_

 _Please, just please don't let it be me._ The hand was completely out of the bowl. _Please don't let it be Eduard._ The paper was opened. _Please don't let it be Raivis._ The man opened his mouth and prepared to speak. _Please don't let it be-_

"Feliks Łukasiewicz!"

 _Feliks…_

Next to him his best friend visibly stiffened. However, he quickly made his way up to the stage with an obvious bounce in his step. He even had the smallest smile on his lips. To anyone else it would seem that he was happy about this development. Toris could see through him though. Feliks's eyes betrayed his emotions; he was _afraid._

"Any volunteers? No? Then shake hands you two." The two newly chosen tributes hesitantly gripped each other's hands and gave one, brief shake. Then the same hands were taken a hold of by the escort and lifted high for everyone to see. "Ladies and gentlemen, your District 3 tributes!"

Feliks and the girl were taken back to the Justice building as most people left the town square. Toris quickly found his brothers and made his way to where his best friend was. They had to wait for his father and mother to finish up their time with him and both were teary eyed as they exited the room.

Upon entering the room, Feliks flung himself onto Toris and gripped him in a hug. There was a sudden dampness on the white dress shirt Toris was wearing, undoubtedly from the tears of the smaller teen.

"I'm, like, sorry." Feliks sniffled as he pulled out of the hug.

"Don't be. You have every right to be upset." The blonde boy grimaced a bit.

 _Smooth, Toris. Great job at cheering him up._

"But I have faith in you!" Toris added quickly. "You can win! I know you can!"

"You don't really think that. I don't have any physical skills…"

"But your charisma is sure to get you sponsors. And allies. We've seen people win with less. Weren't you the one who said that everything would be fine?" The words came out almost too fast to be truly convincing, but Toris let them spill out anyway. He wasn't sure if he was trying to convince his friend or himself.

Feliks stayed silent for a few moments. "...I guess you're right. I won't give up. I'll, like, definitely come home." It was at that moment that the tribute acknowledged the other two brothers. "And when I get back I better not hear that you got into any trouble. Listen to your brother, you especially Raivis. Toris doesn't need anything more to worry about."

A teary eyed Raivis adamantly nodded and Eduard gave a sad smile. They then proceeded to hug the other blonde. With almost perfect timing the peacekeepers came in to announce that the trio's time was up. As they left Feliks said one last thing.

"Toris," He swallowed and gave a shaky smile. "I'll see you later."

* * *

There was no big dinner that night as had been planned. The Łukasiewicz's were mourning prematurely for the loss of their son; there was no doubt that the brother's wouldn't have been welcomed into the house. So instead dinner was a simple soup.

"Is Feliks really going to be okay?" Raivis questioned, passively stirring his soup rather than eating it.

"Feliks is stronger than you think." Toris replied, expertly dodging the question. With that, the table fell silent once again.

* * *

The week leading up to The Games had done nothing to ease Toris's nerves. Feliks had put on the persona of someone who was completely in love with the Capitol and thought it was an honor to have been chosen. That was an angle that hadn't been played for a few years and so it could work to his advantage. That, combined with his training score of five, should have at least given the boy some hope. However, the very real knowledge that Feliks could be dead within days always dashed any of these sentiments.

Now it was only one minute before the tributes would enter the arena. Raivis and Eduard were on both of his sides anxiously waiting for the start along with him. Before they knew it, the tributes were on their platforms and taking in the rocky scenery. This year's arena had many mountains and not a lot of vegetation. That was going to be a problem.

 _It's okay. If Feliks has sponsors then he can get food from them, and there has to be a water source around here somewhere._

The starting gong sounded and chaos ensued. Around four or five of the tributes fled from the Cornucopia. Feliks wasn't among them. He instead was running toward a small pack that was about fifteen feet away from the starting pedestals. He snatched the bag up and sprinted away from the blood bath. Toris couldn't help but smile in a mixture of relief and pride.

That was until he saw the other boy no less than three feet away from Feliks.

He recognized him as the District 6 male. He had snow white hair and piercing red eyes. His cocky attitude in the interviews had rubbed him the wrong way, especially when he had claimed that he could kill any of the other tributes at any time. The only redeeming thing about the situation Toris was viewing was the fact that the tribute- Gilbert might have been his name- didn't seem to have a weapon.

 _Please let him just run past Feliks. Please!_

There was no such luck. Within a few seconds Gilbert had tackled the blond to the ground. While neither of them had a weapon the albino was obviously stronger. Without a second's delay a nearby rock was seized and repeatedly smashed into Feliks's head. The light was fading from the emerald green eyes and there was just so much blood…

The camera unexpectedly switched to another battle that was raging near the mouth of the Cornucopia.

"Toris…" Eduard started as he turned toward his older brother.

"Excuse me for a minute." Toris quickly stood and made his way to the other room. There was just no way. This had to be a joke. Feliks couldn't be dead. Tears pricked at the back of his eyes and eventually were streaming down his face. He tried- to no avail- to wipe them with the sleeves of his shirt.

Wait, they didn't fire the cannons until after the Bloodbath, and the camera didn't catch the last moments of the tribute. That was it. He was still alive; he had to be. Taking a deep breath he returned to the family room and sat back down.

The Bloodbath continued for another ten minutes before the Game Makers decided that it was a good enough time to set off the cannons. There were nine in total. Caesar Flickerman, the new host of The Hunger Games who had debuted this year, started announcing all who was dead. Much to Toris's horror Feliks's name was the first to be read. He along with the the boy from 5, the girl from 6, the girl and boy from 8, the boy from 10, the girl from 11 and the boy and girl from 12 were all killed throughout the Bloodbath.

Throughout the rest of The Games Toris could hardly even concentrate on the horrible events that were taking place. The only time he was watching intently was when the District 6 boy was killed by the brunette girl from 9. He was hit repeatedly over the head with a _frying pan_ of all things. Seeing his friend's killer brought to justice gave Toris a feeling of immense joy. However, he immediately felt guilty and reminded himself that someone had just been killed and returned to his feelings of sorrow.

In the end not even the girl from 9 had won. It was the District 1 Male named Lars. He had been a strong strategist and knew the optimal time to wipe out almost the entirety of the remaining Career pack while he was on watch duty. Injecting each member of the pack with a homemade slow acting, but deadly, poison was the a way to kill everyone without worrying about a cannon going off and waking someone up before he could finish the job.

After The Games were over Feliks's funeral was held. Toris had spoken a few words at the service, but they seemed pretty cliched. For the rest of the year no one brought up the blonde boy as it seemed always happened with dead tributes. No one wanted to think of how unfair the Capitol was taking away young people's lives for no other purpose than entertainment.

Just because he didn't talk about him didn't mean Toris stopped thinking about him. Some days he could be perfectly fine. He could immerse himself in his work, in taking care of his brothers and he would be okay. He laughed at Eduard's comments over dinner, found himself smiling at Raivis and his friend Peter's interactions, and was even content to hum to himself while assembling various gadgets on the assembly line. Other days though it was as if he had just lost his best friend again. The image of his lifeless corpse was seared into his mind and all he could think about was _Why him?_

Had it not been for his brothers, especially in the first weeks after Feliks's death, he probably would have shut down. It was the knowledge that he needed to keep going, for them, that caused Toris to drag himself out of bed some mornings. It also helped that Raivis and Eduard were always there to comfort him when he did start to crack. He constantly thanked the heavens that he was given such a gift.

A whole year passed like that, with nothing more seeming to happen. The only thing that could be considered odd- besides not having Feliks around- was Eduard seemed to disappear every so often for a few hours with no explanation. Toris simply chalked it up as having five new friends to talk to.

The year went by in a flash and before anyone knew it the next Reaping was upon them.


	2. Raivis Laurinaitis

**AN: In this house we vaguely proofread chapters and then post them right away!**

Toris had nobody to reassure him this year as he waited anxiously. The video had already finished up and it was the moment that everyone dreaded. The district escort this year had decided to go for a tacky polka dot theme and even had gloves to match the suit he was wearing. He plucked a slip from the girl's bowl and read it out loud. The girl- something with a w, Wy?- trudged up to the platform, obviously angry.

The escort delicately placed his hand in the boy bowl and didn't even break the surface; the first slip on the top of the pile was selected. The man gently opened it and furrowed his brow. He opened his mouth and slowly pronounced the name, syllable for syllable.

"Ray-vis Lore-in-a-tis? Sorry if I messed up your name son."

Toris's face must have shown the shock that he was feeling at that moment.

 _Ravis_ _Laurinaitis… That's Raivis's name. How could this happen?_

"E-excuse me." A small voice stuttered out as Raivis made his way through the crowd. The young boy's eyes were already filled with tears by the time he made it to the stage. Any chance at appearing strong for sponsors was already out the window.

The escort smiled. "Do we have any volunteers?" Toris was still in shock at that point. Should he volunteer for his brother? That's what any _good_ big brother would do.

"I... Toris's weak whisper could barely even be heard by those around him, let alone the Capitol citizen in front of him. Soon enough Raivis and the other young girl were shaking hands and being hauled over to the Justice Building.

Eduard and Toris practically ran to the Justice Building. Raivis was already bawling his eyes out and buried himself in Eduard's chest. The tall blonde tried to comfort his brother by stroking the youngest's hair and quietly shushing him. However, it didn't do much as Eduard's voice was cracking from his crying as well.

"I-I'm going to die, aren't I?" Raivis sniffled loudly and retracted from the hug.

"That's not true. You c-" Toris started.

"P-please don't lie to me Toris." He looked directly into his brother's eyes. He then hugged Toris. He had tried to be strong, but now tears were streaming down the brunette's face as well. Eduard joined the hug and most of the family's time was spent in silence.

"Raivis," Toris finally said when he noticed the Peacekeepers opening the door. "I just want you to know that no matter what, I love you."

"Even, if you sometimes don't know when to keep quiet" Eduard smirked a little, though it was made less effective by the slight wobble in his lip. " I love you too."

At this moment the Peacekeepers announced that the brother's time together was up. Eduard and Toris started to exit, but Raivis attempted to run after them. He was forcibly held back. The young boy opened his mouth to say something but the heavy oak door was slammed before he could even get the first word out.

* * *

Toris focused on Raivis's week leading up to the games even more than Feliks's if that was possible. The angle that his brother was playing could be summed up in one word: pity. After his performance at The Reaping and his red rimmed eyes getting onto the train there was no other way to go.

Usually this tactic was reserved for younger tributes of twelve or thirteen, not a fifteen year old boy. However with his small frame and large eyes it worked fairly well. Despite the success though, the boy's eyes didn't show much hope for the entire situation.

Throughout the whole week Toris had his eyes on one other particular tribute as well. He was a tall and strong looking male hailing from District 7. He had a chubby face, blonde hair, and violet eyes not unlike Raivis. This tribute, Ivan Braginsky, was one that was favored to win and rumors had it that he might even join the career pack.

All too soon it was once again time for The Hunger Games to begin. Raivis was visibly shaking on his pedestal. He had the District 12 female, a short and plain brown haired girl, Xiao Mei, on his left while the District 1 female Lucille was on his right.

That might be a problem.

Although she seemed to be a small and weak girl, the blonde had proven she could hold her own in a fight with a training score of seven. Soon enough the gong sounded and the tributes were off.

Lucille and Mei ran forward and Raivis was behind them. The boy surged forward and grabbed a pack off the ground. He then quickly turned. However, the ground was slippery with mud and he fell down. Lucille, noticing this development, turned around and stalked toward the vulnerable tribute.

 _No._ Toris's eyes were wide from fright. He assumed Eduard's were as well but he couldn't force himself to tear his eyes from the screen. _It can't end this way. Not like it did with Feliks._ He wanted to squeeze his eyes shut to spare him the horror, but he couldn't. He couldn't abandon his brother like that.

As Raivis attempted to escape the young career stomped on his chest, keeping him down. She then impassively opened the pack lying on the ground and removed a metal thermos. She had the audacity to look bored as the young boy gripped her ankle in a futile attempt to shake his attacker. Lucille raised the thermos over her head.

 _This is it._

Without warning, however, Lucille's neck turned sharply and she fell over. Ivan stood there with a worried expression though it was nothing compared to the look of unadulterated terror present in Raivis's eyes.

"Do you want to become one with me?" Ivan asked as he scooped down and collected the thermos and backpack.

"B-b-become one?" Raivis asked as he propped himself up on his elbows and caught his breath.

"An alliance." The large tribute gave a small, childish smile. All Toris's brother could do was nod shakily as Ivan helped him to his feet. The duo then began running toward the many coniferous trees in the arena.

Toris exhaled. He hadn't even been aware that he had been holding his breath for the entire ordeal.

"I thought he was done for." Eduard commentated in awe.

"Maybe Raivis has more of a chance than any of us thought."

* * *

After around two hours of trekking through the forest the two decided to stop and check their supplies. As it turned out Ivan had secured two survival knives and a large metal pipe of some sort from the Cornucopia. One knife was promptly given to Raivis who had no idea how to handle the thing. Eventually Ivan helped him secure it in the pocket of his pants.

"Why…" The young boy started, refusing to meet Ivan's gaze. 'Why did you save me?"

"Well, it might seem a bit odd but… I don't want to be all alone." Ivan pulled up on his long white scarf in embarrassment. Raivis didn't reply to this and simply continued rifling through their supplies.

The camera then cut to the career alliance, thus allowing the Laurinaitis brothers to relax, albeit ever so slightly.

* * *

It only took about four days for the field of tributes to be narrowed down to the Final Eight and Raivis was among them. The brothers were promptly escorted to the Capitol so they could be interviewed.

The coaching before the interview was brutal and strenuous to say the least. Knowing that anything he said could directly affect Raivis's chance at survival almost made Toris sweat through the suit he had been dressed in. Additionally, seeing all the other tributes' family members was also nerve wracking.

There was one girl in particular though who especially caught his eye. She had beautiful long blonde hair and striking blue eyes. She had to be the most gorgeous person Toris had ever seen.

It also just so happened that she was the sister of one Ivan Braginsky.

"Hello there." A pretty young woman with short blonde hair planted herself in the seat next to Toris. "I'm Katyusha, and who might you be?" While there was a friendly lilt in her voice, Toris noticed her leg bouncing a mile a minute. She must have been as nervous as he was.

"I'm uh Toris Laurinaitis and this is my brother Eduard." Toris gestured vaguely over to Eduard who had been adjusting his glasses for the past five minutes, hardly paying attention.

"Oh so you're little Raivis's brothers! How wonderful!" She seemed to relax at this, but only slightly. "He's a very cute boy you know."

"I- uh, thank you?"

"I was so surprised when I heard he was 15! I thought for sure he was 12 or 13, maybe newly 14 at the very oldest." Katyusha's chipper tone continued as she bounced in her seat, trying to rid herself of excess energy.

"Yes that's what everyone says. He actually sometimes used to be mistaken as a grade schooler and he would throw a fit about it." Eduard joined the conversation and sat on the other side of Toris. Eduard and Katyusha continued the pleasant conversation for a good while, both not acknowledging the circumstances that allowed them to meet in the first place.

"It's funny actually because he-"

"My brother will kill yours." The beautiful blonde, who had remained silent, interrupted Toris's comment.

"Natalya!" Katyusha exclaimed.

"I hate this feeling of tiptoeing around the subject. One of our brothers is going to die and it sure as hell isn't going to be Ivan so it'll have to be the boy from 3." There was very little emotion evident in her voice as she held eye contact with Toris.

Some deep part of Toris was almost thankful she had spoken up with the truth. The four of them all knew it and it was admittedly awkward to carry on as if nothing was amiss. As if one of, if not both of, their brothers would be dead within the next two weeks. Her confidence in her brother intrigued him though. How could she have that much faith in a situation that favored no one.

Before anyone could reply Eduard and Toris were ushered into the wings to go on air.

"So, how do you two feel about your brother's prospects of winning?" Caesar Flickerman asked.

Toris was nervous, because if he answered honestly, it still wasn't very good. Sure, he had survived this long but that was only because of who he was allied with. If Raivis had been all alone he would have been dead by now.

"Oh, he may not look like it, but Raivis has more skills than one might think." Eduard answered with a smirk on his face.

The interview continued with questions of a similar vein and soon enough time was up. As the two left the set they sat anxiously in the lobby of the area. The next interview was Ivan's two sisters. Throughout the interview he watched the younger, Natalya, closely.

She seemed quite aloof but when it came to her brother she obviously cared a lot. Her eyes gleamed whenever his accomplishments were mentioned but narrowed to slits if any doubts were raised. Toris found himself deeply enraptured with her but he couldn't quite figure out why.

He quickly cleared his head of such thoughts. He didn't need distractions. Raivis was the one who was important now. He was the only thing that mattered.

* * *

The day after Toris and Eduard arrived home from the Capitol was when it happened. It was down to the final four and it was obvious that both Raivis and Ivan were on edge. Neither of them were idiots; they knew that one of them would have to die sooner or later.

"I-I think I'm going to go get some water from the river." Raivis squeaked out as he quickly grabbed the thermos off the ground.

"...Okay." Raivis left Ivan alone with his thoughts. The large male stared at his hands and seemed to make up his mind as he grabbed the pipe and headed in the same direction as his ally.

Toris's face blanched in terror. He had known this moment would come sometime but he hadn't prepared himself, always putting the thought off for another day. Eduard visibly stiffened and grabbed for Toris's hand. Usually the blonde wouldn't do this but Toris didn't comment on it.

On the screen Ivan carefully stalked toward the small tribute. Raivis was kneeling by the river and capping the thermos, having already collected some water. Instead of raising his pipe, the District 7 citizen quickly grabbed Raivis's head and plunged it under the water. The boy began flailing around and screaming, the sounds of which were garbled by the water.

"I'm really sorry, Raivis. I didn't want you to be in pain."

Toris couldn't believe what he was hearing. No pain?! Raivis's lungs must have been on fire at that moment. If Ivan had truly wanted Raivis to feel as little pain as possible he would have quickly slit his throat or snapped his neck like he had with Lucille.

Raivis wasn't going down without a fight though. He grabbed his survival knife from his pocket and quickly slashed at his assailant. Ivan dodged without a scratch but had to let go of Raivis's head, allowing the boy to reemerge from the water. He immediately began coughing as he attempted getting to his feet.

"I really didn't want to do this." Ivan truly did seem remorseful as he adjusted his grip on his pipe. He raised his weapon above his head and struck Raivis's temple. The boy's eyes didn't even close as he fell to the ground. It didn't take long for a cannon to sound signaling his death. "Don't worry little one. I'll win for you too."

Neither one of the brothers acknowledged the other's tears. They were silent as they watched Ivan carefully lay Raivis down and close the now dead boy's eyelids. He ran his hand through his hair, over the dented portion of the boy's skull and seemed almost reluctant to move his hand. Finally, he took the knife from Raivis's hand. The hovercraft retrieved his body and there was nothing left to show someone had been murdered, not even any blood. Ivan grabbed the thermos and quickly headed back to his base camp.

* * *

Ivan won the Thirty-Fourth Hunger Games. Nobody was very surprised and everyone in the Capitol had said it was too predictable. There weren't enough "plot twists" for them.

Toris and Eduard however had a funeral to plan. To them it hadn't been just another program; their brother's life had been taken and cut short. Not many people attended Raivis's funeral- he had been neither as friendly nor as important as Feliks. It consisted solely of the brothers, the funeral director, Eduard's friends, Peter and Arthur Kirkland, and a few odd classmates.

Raivis seemed to have been forgotten even quicker than Feliks. It wasn't until the Victory Parade six months later was the name mentioned from the mouth of anyone besides Toris, Eduard, or ever so occasionally Peter. Ivan's speech had been very flat and seemed insincere to everyone present; it was being read of a set of notecards for heaven's sake. However, the monotone was broken when he finished his speech.

"Actually, I am not quite finished here." Ivan said as he looked up from his note cards. His gaze fell onto Toris and Eduard. "Before I go, can I speak with Raivis's family?"

The escort for Ivan looked shocked as she glanced toward the Peacekeepers for assistance. They grudgingly gave consent and escorted the tall boy over to the brothers. At first, neither of the two parties knew what to say.

"I just… I wished to apologize." Ivan refused to make eye contact as he nervously played with his scarf. It continued to be silent. "I know you could never forgive me. I can't even forgive myself." He closed his eyes and took a steadying breath. "There are some nights where I hear his voice calling to me and then it turns jumbled, as if I am underwater. Sometimes I see his shy smile before I am met with his lifeless eyes. What I did, it was not a fair fight. I could have at least given him a chance. I could have…"

The silence that followed seemed to stretch for eternity. The sound of citizens chatting amongst themselves was the only noise available for a while.

"I may not forgive you for killing him," Toris started, surprising himself. "But you saved his life once, and you gave him a friend during his time in the arena. That, I can thank you for."

Ivan smiled sadly as he pulled at his scarf. "I was not a very good friend."

"It wasn't your fault." Eduard blurted out, seeming to find his voice. "Not completely at least. It was The Games. If it weren't for them…" Toris and Ivan's eyes widened at this proclamation. People didn't just say those kinds of things against the Capitol. This especially applied when there were Peacekeepers present not ten feet away.

"I think that's enough talking." One particularly burly Peacekeeper said. "You should go back Ivan." The victor was nudged away from the Laurinaitis' as he desperately attempted to maintain eye contact. Soon enough, peacekeepers escorted the two back to the square as well.

"What were you thinking?!" Toris quickly snapped at his brother.

"I believe I stated what I was thinking. Everyone knows it; it shouldn't be that big of a surprise to simply have someone say it out loud."

Toris softened his voice. "Please don't get into any trouble. You're the only one I have left." He then went in for a quick hug.

The taller boy stiffened and then wrapped his arms around Toris. "Don't worry. I won't get in trouble."


	3. Eduard Laurinaitis

**AN: Writing this I realized why I left this story just sitting for so long. I know what I wanted to say vaguely but I couldn't find I good flow or path to getting there. Eventually I just settled for this. This definitely isn't my best work but I just want to get this out there y'know? The next chapter is the last one I believe (unless it gets too long and I have to break it into two which I might but... let's hope not lol). Also can I just go and hit my past self for writing this story in the past tense. It's making it even more difficult for me to write since I'm so used to writing in the present tense now**

If Feliks's death was hard to come to terms with, Raivis's was impossible. Some nights Toris could only stare at the ceiling as memories flitted through his brain. One that always seemed to worm its way between any idle thoughts came from the teen's childhood, back before their father died and their mother mysteriously disappeared.

 _A ten year old Toris carried a heavy crate of jars out of the house and into the alley next to it. He wasn't sure what was giving his load its weight, but his mother had asked him to help her with the task and he was more than happy to oblige. Unable to see with the box obscuring his vision, he heard his little brother's sniffles before he saw him. Toris stilled and gently set the crate down._

" _Raivis?" The boy in question was sitting on the ground next to a neighbor's trash can. His eyes were rimmed red from crying and his nose and hand were covered in blood. "Raivis! What happened?!"_

" _No-nothing!" Raivis quickly attempted to rub away the blood trickling from his nose, but only succeeded in smearing it across his cheek. Upon realizing this, more tears welled up in the eight year old's eyes._

" _This doesn't look like nothing…" Toris remarked gently. "How about we get a better look at you? The ground is no place for a kid like you." And though Raivis was getting too big for this, the older brother lifted him onto the crate he had been carrying a few moments prior._

 _With only minimal hesitation Toris ripped the cuff of his left sleeve off his shirt and held it to his brother's nose. He tilted the boy's head forward and then began to run his free hand through his blond curls. It was getting a bit long; he would probably need a haircut soon._

" _So what happened?" Toris tried again. Raivis's sniffling hadn't completely ceased but at least he wasn't crying anymore. Toris also took comfort in the fact his brother was now leaning into his touch._

" _I-I was playing and-and these kids from school came an-an-and" Raivis couldn't make it through his sentence but Toris got the picture. Due to his small stature and knack for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, it was no wonder other kids targeted Raivis. He had never known the bullying to turn physical though._

" _Shh shh it's okay." He quickly enveloped his brother in a hug. "Did they hurt you anywhere else?"_

" _No… they pushed me but when they saw the blood from my nose they ran away…"_

" _That's good." Toris let out a sigh of relief and pulled away from the hug. He still kept a hand on Raivis's arm. "If something like this ever happens come and get me. I'll protect you, no matter what."_

 _Raivis gave a watery smile at this and nodded. Toris then wordlessly offered his hand and led him back inside for their mother to inspect the damage. Raivis's hand squeezed tightly in his own and Toris could only think of how nice the feeling was._

He had failed. He couldn't protect his brother when it counted and now he was dead. Dead, deceased, six feet under. He tried to muffle the sound of his crying so that Eduard couldn't hear him fall apart.

 _I need to stay strong, for him._

* * *

Instead of talking and sticking together like Toris expected, Eduard began disappearing more often now. Some days Toris never even caught a glimpse of his brother. He might not be in bed when Toris woke up for work, Toris ate in silence as the seat across the table remained empty, and when he fell in bed at the end of the day Eduard wasn't across the room changing into his own night clothes.

With no one to hide it from, the sound of Toris's crying filled the house

* * *

After a particularly exhausting shift at the factory Toris fell asleep in the living room. The following morning, the rustling of boots and a winter coat woke the brunet. He blinked a couple times before realizing the figure in front of him was his brother.

"Eduard, where are you off to?" The blonde teen stopped, the front door of the Laurinaitis house slightly ajar. He was halfway through wrapping his scarf around his neck.

"Tino invited me over." An awkward silence fell over the room.

 _Why are you going out so much? Talk to me Eduard; you're all I have left. I feel like I'm losing you too._

"Make sure you're back before seven. I'm making stew for dinner." Toris gave Eduard a small smile which his brother returned half-heartedly.

"See you later." With that Eduard was out the door, letting the cool winter wind into the house. Toris curled closer into himself, once again alone with his emotions.

* * *

It was another two weeks before Toris was able to see his brother leaving again.

"Where are you going?" Eduard jumped as his brother's voiced made it's way through the room.

"Tino and Berwald-"

"Can stand to not see you for one night." The anger bubbling up in Toris began to seep its way into his tone. He crossed the room and stood in front of the front door.

"Toris this is _important_. They need me to-"

"Well what if _I_ need you right now Eduard!" The blond flinched back, not used to being the object of his usually calm brother's anger. "Do you know how hard it is for me to come home every night to an empty house? For me to feel like I've not lost one brother but two? I can't handle this Eduard!"

Eduard deflated at his brother's words, but his eyes were still full of conviction. "You haven't lost me Toris. I'm still here."

"Then why don't you act like it? You're always off with your friends doing heaven knows what while I'm stuck here alone. If you cared you would be here." Toris felt like a child as the tears worked their way into his eyes and his voice began to shake.

"It's because I care that I can't be here."

"That's a load of crap and you know it."

"Toris I need you to trust me, to believe me on this. I'm sorry I can't be with you but I _need_ to do this. This is the only thing that can help."

"Bull."

"I'm doing this for you and Raivis!"

"Yeah, well Raivis is dead. Not a whole lot you can do to help him now, is there." The bitterness present in Toris's voice hung the room as he stepped away from the door and turned his back to Eduard. After a few moments of silence, he heard the door open and close, indicating his brother's departure.

 _Why did I do that?_

* * *

The next day, Toris had the day off. However, he needed to keep himself busy somehow and so he took up the task of cleaning the house, top to bottom. He remembered how his mother always fussed about the value a clean house could have on the mind and soul. Maybe those benefits would magically rub off on him as well. He doubted it.

Today was different though. While he had kept up with the housework for the most part, he could never bring himself to go through Raivis's portion of the room. Now though, he thought he was ready, or at least now was as good of a time as any other.

 _It's been nine months. If you can't do this now, you'll never be able to._

The first hour was mostly uneventful. Toris would pack away whatever he could without becoming lost in all the memories associated with each item. He reached for a small journal and felt his entire body deflate. It was one of Raivis's poetry notebooks. The boy would often write in the book whenever his emotions overtook him. The book and its predecessors had seen a lot of use throughout the years.

Toris absently flipped through the pages, not taking much in, until a slip of paper fell. The bright white did not match the aged yellow of the notebook, meaning it wasn't just a page Raivis had accidentally torn out and shoved back in. The teen picked up the slip and began to carefully examine it.

" _Shipment: April 17 14:00, Guards: 4, Outside Assistance: N/A"_

"What on earth…?" The slip showed no other evidence to point toward its purpose. Toris reluctantly went back to sorting through Raivis's things, however this time he began to look for other papers as well.

Within the half hour Toris had pulled a dozen full spreadsheets of data from among his brother's possessions as well as about three times as many scraps of paper with seemingly random information. He spread the papers in front of him, attempting to decipher the meaning of the data.

 _L.B. and E.S.- Covert stealth_

 _T.V.- Info gathering_

 _B.O. Standby_

 _M.K. Distraction if necessary_

 _E.L. Info and technology cover_

All of the documents seemed to be penned by different people, sometimes up to four different scrawls would appear on one page at a time. Toris stopped in his tracks as he recognized Eduard's handwriting neatly analyzing the data presented in the spreadsheet he was holding. Slowly but surely the pieces clicked into place. These documents weren't Raivis's, rather they were placed among his things by Eduard. He couldn't quite fathom why though.

As he was contemplating this, the door to the room opened.

"Hey Toris, are you in here? I was out of line yesterday and…" Eduard trailed off as he took in the scene of his brother surrounded by the sheets of information. "What uh, what are you looking at?"

"You tell me."

"Those are just some assignments. I don't know where you could have found them." The hesitation in his voice did not go unnoticed by Toris.

"Eduard… please stop lying to me."

"I can't tell you Toris. Just in case anything happens I don't want people to think you were involved and so the less you know the better." A rock dropped in the elder's stomach at his brother's words. If he didn't know what was going on before, he had a good inkling of an idea now. His brother was somehow caught up in rebel activities. No matter how seemingly small of a law broken, the Capitol would not hesitate to kill known traitors.

"In case anything happens?" Toris's voice gained a new sense of desperation in it. "Now I'm really worried. Please don't leave me in the dark. I can help you Eduard! Whatever this is," he gestured widely at the papers splayed before them "I can help. We can just get rid of the papers and no one will know about any of this. _Please."_ At this point Toris had made his way across the room and desperately grasped at his brother's sleeve.

"I'm sorry Toris but I can't." To his credit, Eduard did truly look remorseful as he shook off Toris and began collecting the data sheets. "If it makes you feel any better I won't keep these in the house anymore."

"The only thing that would make me feel better is you not having those at all!"

"I think we both know it's a little too late for that."

"I don't think we do. I just… I can't understand you Eduard. Why would you jeopardize yourself like this? It's been over thirty years and no one's been able to stop the Capitol. In fact, the last time there was an uprising a district was obliterated and the Hunger Games were created. You and five other boys can't possibly do any differently. Why do you bother? Why…?"

"Every revolution has to start somewhere." After Eduard shoved the last of the papers into his bag he approached his brother. "And if I don't do this, who will?"

"Who says someone needs to do this?"

"So you're really okay with the way things are?"

"Well of course not!"

"So then something needs to be done!" Eduard countered.

"Yes but… why do you have to be the one who does it?"

"Because Feliks and Raivis were the ones who had to die." With that, the blond took his exit.

"No wait, Eduard _please_." But the only sound that answered Toris was that of the front door slamming.

* * *

Toris didn't get the chance to apologize; the next two days passed without word from Eduard and Toris tried not to let his anxiety get the better of him. This certainly wasn't the first time the blond disappeared for days on end. Still, Toris had a sinking feeling in his stomach that he couldn't shake no matter what he did.

Three days after his fight with Eduard, Toris discovered the reason for his unease.

He and the rest of his coworkers were pulled from the factory with the explanation that there was a mandatory gathering in the town square. Everyone was confused, but grateful for the hour or so of work that they would be getting out of. In fact, the topic of conversation as the crew headed over to the square was whether or not they would be paid even though they weren't working. Somehow Toris doubted it.

As they neared the square Toris could make out the gallows that were set up with six forms standing on the platform. He began sweating. Public executions were always horrible. The peacekeepers never covered the condemneds' faces and so everyone would be forced look upon their lifeless faces. Toris kept his eyes on his shoes. He hated having to look at those he knew would be dead within the hour. He found his place and hoped that the whole ordeal would be over quickly.

"Toris…" Toris's coworker grabbed the teenager's attention. "Isn't that…?" When Toris looked up to see what the man next to him was talking about he felt all his breath leave his body. There on the platform, at the end of the line, was Eduard with his hands bound.

Surprisingly, Toris's legs didn't crumple out from under him, however he did grab his coworker's shoulder to support him. Eduard? What was he doing up there?

Toris already knew the answer to that though. Despite his reassurances, he and his friends had gotten caught. Whatever illegal activities he was participating in had caught up with him. Guilt rushed through Toris like morphine. If only he had kept closer tabs on his brother, if only he hadn't let him leave that night would this still be happening? He was pulled from his thoughts at the head peacekeeper's voice cut through the air.

"Today six traitors to the Capitol stand before you. They were caught tampering with weapons shipments and hacking into Capitol information systems. For such crimes the punishment is death." The man motioned and the peacekeeper on the end opposite of Eduard pushed one of Eduard's friends forward and onto a wooden crate.

"Tino Väinämöinen" The head peacekeeper said nothing besides the man's name as the noose was placed around his neck. As soon as everything was in place the peacekeeper nodded and the signal was given to kick the crate out from under Tino.

However, Tino's neck didn't break. Instead, the rope tightened around his neck as he desperately scratched at it. His gasps for breath were audible to the silent crowd. Worst of all, the peacekeeper didn't move onto the next man's execution, forcing everyone to watch in horror as Tino fought a battle he would inevitably lose. At this same time, the tall man next to Tino struggled against the two peacekeepers restraining him. His cries were muffled by his gag however. After a few minutes, Tino finally went limp and the tall man was brought up.

"Berwald Oxenstierna" The process was repeated for Berwald as well, though mercifully his death was short and to the point. Matthias and Lukas's were this way as well, though Emil suffered the same fate as Tino.

When it came time for Eduard, Toris morbidly hoped that his brother's death would be quick. He didn't think he could handle having to watch his brother struggle to even take a breath. It would be too much like seeing Raivis fight against Ivan when he was pushed into the stream.

As Eduard was brought forward, his brother looked right at him. Eduard's eyes softened as he met Toris's as if to say "Please don't blame yourself" and "I'm sorry".

"Eduard Laurinaitis" Almost in slow motion, the peacekeeper nodded and the box was kicked out from under him. Eduard's eyes widened in surprise as he fell and stayed open when the rope pulled taut. The only consolation present in the situation was that his neck snapped almost immediately. There was no squirming and fighting for life.

Toris's mind went blank, unable to tear his eyes off his brother's corpse. The head peacekeeper was offering some closing remarks but the teen couldn't make any of them out. He had just watched his brother die, right in front of him. Executed by the Capitol.

This was different than watching Feliks or Raivis. With them he could only watch through a television screen as they were murdered. No matter how he wished he could help or somehow change the situation, he physically was unable.

Eduard though… with Eduard, he was right there. He could have done something, if only he wasn't a coward. He pushed away the rational side of him that argued that even if he had done something it would have only resulted in both his and Eduard's demise. His brother would have had to die knowing he indirectly caused Toris's death. All Toris focused on was the overwhelming guilt consuming him. Why was he the one still alive?

Why?

He couldn't come up with a good answer to that.


End file.
